Cute

Look, another free write! Yay. So much to think about at the end of the year (yeah, this was written last year, I'm just now getting around to posting it...), but sometimes it is nice to think about something else for a while.

Finally got him down for his nap. Babies are usually cute, but they are definitely cutest when they're sleeping. You can't be tired of or annoyed with babies while they're sleeping. You forget about how hungry they always are, how loud they can scream, and how much they can stink--well, as long as they don't stink while they're sleeping. For just that little bit of time that their eyes are closed they have a look of complete serenity and peace.
One of the cutest experiences is watching a baby fall asleep as you sing a lullaby. Babies sleeping are adorable, but watching them fall asleep is even sweeter.
Babies in general are the cutest. They kind of have to be. If they weren't so freaken adorable, people wouldn't be as inclined to have them. Who wants something that isn't adorable but costs a fortune and makes your hair turn grey? If you don't believe me, go change some dirty diapers, watch the same show 20 times in a row, and try to stop a baby from crying. And clean up after feeding them. Bathe them. Read the same book again and again. Hurt your back by lifting and spinning them too much.
But despite all that, they are the cutest. Helpless little beings that make you helpless to do anything but love them and take care of them. It'd be pretty manipulative if they actually knew what they were doing. But they don't so it's the cutest.

Transformation

            I’ve been reading Spinning Straw into Gold: What Fairy Tales Reveal about the Transformations in a Woman’s Life. I find that sort of thing fascinating. I’ve always loved fairy tales, even while I still hated reading. Maybe it was the pretty pictures or how magical they were or just that they were short. Anyway, I think it’s a fascinating book.

            So, I’m reading a chapter on Cinderella and Gould talks about outward appearance changing being a reflection of an inward transformation: “In real life as well as in stories, any radical change in body weight, dress shoes, hair style or length…is an outer signal that transformation is underway. If a career woman with short hair lets her hair grow long or dyes it another color, keep a sharp lookout for the romantic development that’s sure to follow.”

            Yeah, that’s true…

            And I’m realizing my appearance has taken a turn. Last year I quit being a beauty consultant for Mary Kay, but I continued wearing makeup, until NaNoWriMo happened… And I donated my hair to locks of love, which I do a lot (this was my sixth time). And because of my job and how busy I feel, I stopped wearing jewelry.

            Oh my goodness, I feel like I’ve given up hope of finding a guy?!

I can go back to Mary Kay at any time. I was recently invited back, and I thought about it. It’d be nice to look nice again, but then I’d have to shave my legs more often so I can wear skirts and going to bed would require taking off makeup (mascara is kind of a pain for me), etc. I opted not to.

            I have always liked donating my hair to locks of love. In college in one of my English classes we talked about how nuns cut and cover their hair as a form of hiding their sexuality. I kind of liked cutting my hair short for that reason. I never had a boyfriend and cutting my hair was kind of a way of admitting I didn’t want one at the time (or to suppress the desire for one). My hair is growing out, but I’ve just been pulling it back in a ponytail, which is kind of hiding it. And I’ve kind of had the desire to do a pixy cut again because then I could just ignore it—until it needed to be cut again…

            The clothes I’ve recently bought have been to show off my love of literature, but they also are pretty. But does a bookworm intimidate guys? I do want a guy who can talk literature… And the chances of that happening are?

            Yep, I think I have given up on guys for this time period. Sad, but I’ve had other things to focus on. I do have enough nice clothes and time to make myself look nice, but I guess I’ve just decided that it isn’t worth the time and effort. I’m sure guys are worth the time and effort, but I can’t miss what I never had, right? 

Response to "Sincerely one of many girls who care"

Okay, I’ll admit it, I’ve been on a bit of a feminist mood lately. I’m not a feminist, but there are a few things that I do agree with them on. A few of my guy friends posted this article on facebook: http://bemalleable.wordpress.com/2013/12/31/sincerely-one-of-many-girls-who-care/ . It does have some really good points, but it is pretty much completely one side—oh, guys, you poor things for having to deal with this culture we live in!

Ummm, news flash, girls struggle too! So here is my response to some of the things she says:

“I’m sorry that you see hundreds of advertisements every week showing half-dressed women.”

I’m sorry us women have to see those. They never cause body image issues at all… Oh, wait. They do. And she goes on to talk about how all the reporters and sports announcers are pretty too. We are surrounded by images of young, attractive women.

And what about those ads with half naked men portrayed as sex objects? Yeah, there aren’t as many of those, but aren’t they stumbling blocks for women (And might cause guys to have body image issues)?

“I’m sorry every time you go to the beach or your neighborhood pool you can’t look in any direction without seeing a girl basically in her underwear.”

I could go to a neighborhood park and see plenty of guys without shirts playing sports or exercising. Do they ever have to worry about a girl making a move on them or calling them immodest? I’ve had to get over the fact that guys have bodies. Maybe it’s harder for guys to get over the fact that women have bodies? I don’t know.

It’d be really great if we could all just be modest and cover up. But, I’ll admit, I’m not always great at that. I wear tank tops under every shirt, but sometimes the tank tops aren’t made with much higher of a neck line. I am immensely glad that long shirts are in style, but they still sometimes ride up. As long as I’m trying to be modest, is that good enough? Why don’t guys ever have to worry about that sort of thing?

“Not only are you surrounded with a world that’s obsessed with worthless, cheap sex and relationships that mean nothing outside of sexual appeal, you’re encouraged to take part in seeing women as only objects of sex and instant pleasure.”

Women are taught to not take risks—always watch your drink, don’t go down dark allies or anywhere alone, always be on guard. Women have been degraded and taught to fear. But where in the public sphere are we teaching guys to try to control themselves? It’s taught in churches, maybe a mention of it in a class or two, but never as much as the need for women to protect themselves. Why?

I’m afraid that more women are falling prey to the idea of “meaningless” and “cheap sex”. Not enough places are talking about sex being more than just pleasure. Even outside of churches, doesn’t anybody realize sex without love doesn’t bring any good? One night stands might bring pleasure for that one night, but does it really change anything later? Best case scenario: nothing comes of it. Worst case scenario: an unplanned pregnancy or STD. Middle case scenario: regret or you just not finding what you really wanted. Am I wrong?

Porn.

Probably more men are addicted to porn or have at least seen it. But women have more temptation when it comes to books. There’s all sorts of romance novels (with sex scenes or not, I’m not sure it matters). Plus, I’ve read war novels for college that had some pretty hot scenes in them. It doesn’t really matter what genre you go for, there will probably be a mention of romance if not sex.

So, to sum it up: both sexes have to deal with temptation and body image.

This house

 If I weren't so familure with this house, it'd seem creepy. The way the plants are hunched over, looking forlorn. The way the ivy hangs on the house like its the one who owns it. The way three or four clocks tick loudly off of each other, like they don't know if time is passing too quickly or too slowly, but either way its going without you. The way all the ceiling fans are on, causing cool drafts. The way light doesn't seem to invite life. The way dirt and dust collects all too quickly.
This house isn't creepy though. It might be neglected, but it's not abandoned. Everything has made this house its home: the plants and ivy, theclocks and fans, the dust and dirt, and maybe even the real owners

Happy New Year!!

 Hope you all had a great end to last year. And I hope you have even more to look forward to this coming year. It is always great to have goals to work towards and dreams to look forward to.
Right now, I'm really looking forward to watching Sherlock series 3! I haven't gotten that far in the books & stories yet, but it's super exciting! I've really come to love the late 1800's sense of humor. Maybe Sherlock doesn't completely capture it, but it's pretty close and amazingly accurate considering it's set in modern times.
I'm such a nerd, but I really like it that way. And I now have 3 nerdy Out of Print Clothing shirts to prove it (Pride & prejudice, Their Eyes were Watching God, and The Hound of the Baskervilles). They make me so happy! Yep, simple but I know they'll make me very happy in 2014.
So, I guess by now you've figured out this is just another rambling blog & not free writing or inspirational. Well, if you're a nerd like me it might inspire you to let your nerd out.
Let's see here, what else? I feel like there are already too many things out there about "New Year, New You!" and go do it! Nice, but keep it realistic as well. And measurable! It is always good to have goals that are measureable. Don't do "Get in shape." Instead do "Be able to do x amount of x in x amount of minutes" (1 mile in 8 minutes. Or 50 crunches in one set). And make it something that will last the year, like read 50 books this year (that's one of my resolutions).

The squirrel

So this story is very short and incomplete (and probably odd). It's a free writing blog, get over it.

 Climbing up a tree, Sammy the squirrel could hear the dog barking after him. The dog had chased him across the yard where Sammy had been sniffing around for food. All he'd found were empty wrappers though.
Sammy stopped. It was partly because he was out of reach of the dog, but mostly because he got distracted by something shiny. Aproaching the glittering object, Sammy realized that it a plastic costume ring little girls like to play with.
Sammy took the ring and looked around for the little girl who might have lost it. Not seeing any girls playing outside, he climbed higher in the tree. He still couldn't see any girls playing outside, but he did see that one of the houses had a babydoll in a stroller outside. A bird must have taken the ring from that house and dropped it while flying over the tree.
Sammy jumped from tree to tree until he was at the house with the doll and stroller. He dropped

Four days till Christmas

 It feels less like Christmas time if I just stay home. But it's begun snowing, which makes me very happy.
That reminds me, I don't think I've ever written about why I love snow so much. Let me start by saying, I don't think the same way a lot of people do (in case you haven't noticed). My grandma died some years ago around Christmas, and that is probably my most memorable Christmas. Not my best Christmas, but it wasn't as bad as you might expect. It was full of family and a few small miracles.
She had told my grandpa that she was going to get everyone home for Christmas, and most of the family did stay around for Christmas day. She had loved snow. As soon as everyone had made it safely to the town, a light snow began. My grandpa said she was cleaning up the world. And that's my favorite way of looking at snow. It covers everything in peace and beauty. Snow is the most beautiful weather to me (though I do hate driving in it!).
So Christmas is a special time to me. I want to share my love for the season with everyone. I want everyone to feel the true meaning of Christmas. It is the vest time of the year.